Debutante

Patience is a virtue I could honestly say I haven’t mastered yet (nor have the patience itself to work on). I’m not a shameless impatient person.. I’m the kind who holds it in.. the kind who bottles everything up inside.. and the kind who goes schizophrenic after a while. I know, I know. It’s not healthy.. and I should learn how to healthily vent all my frustrations.

And so I resort to writing, a more painless and bloodless ordeal.

Anyway.. Today is a bad day for everything.

Let me count the ways….

I am being charged the out-of-country fee for college. One hundre-fucking-ninety-three dollars per unit. No, I don’t poop greenbacks, nor do my parents, I think. And so I had to establish my residency here.. So I had to drive down there this afternoon with all my legal papers, utility bills, a year-long record or my parents’ mortgage payments, the house papers, and my passport in tow.

By the way, I drove Rain today (MY new car)… And on the way to the student parking lot, there is this curve… and to make the long, painful story short, I hit the curb.. and that left a foot-long, half an inch wide scratch on the sideskirt of my new car.

I was close to tears when I saw the damage..

But then I had to compose myself because I had to talk to the admission lady and sort out my residency status. So I marched in the Admissions office and there were at least 15 people on the line. Just what I needed..

So I stayed on the line for a good 15-minute period - with all the while I was having bouts of anxiety attacks thinking about my car.. And then there came the good part.. I found out that I wasn’t supposed to go on that line.. that I was to go to the other side of the room. To my relief, there were only two people waiting on the window I was supposed to go into. So I waited.. 5 minutes became 10.. and 10 became 20 minutes.. and 20 minutes became 45 minutes.. and no person in the window showed up.

I was going nuts.. Made me think I might have schizophrenia tendencies because I was pissed and I was anxious.

I rang the little counter bell, and the guy who was waiting with me looked as if I made an offense.

“Well, that’s what it’s here for, right?” I remarked.

I guess he understood. We were both in the same line for the longest time without any assistance or assurance whatsoever. I was this close [–] to just saying fuck it.. but then a guy passed by and he was able to accommodate me.

And for this anomaly in the universe and because my day is apparently off to a bad start, I was not able to sort out my papers for the residency thing in the end of all the trouble.

So my sister and I drove home.. and to gratify what’s left of me, I headed to Burger King to get my depression medication. Nothing can do a better job than a hearty Whopper burger, some king-fries, and a tub of ice-cold coke in times like this.

Fuck prom. I dont care if I become a tub of lard by then..

… no not really.